Sunday, May 31, 2009

Bonus Movie Review: Up

Hello, I have removed the dark lord aspect of my title (don't know what I was thinking *shudders*) . So, Nollaf here has remodeled his fortress of darkness and despair, ect, ect. Pretty oh, whats the vulgar term that those adolescents use to describe something descent...oh what was it again..? Ah yes, ahem "pimp". Well then, enough with the little advancement, lets get on with the bonus review.

Up, such a simple title. Hardly suits the true complexity behind the film's simple plot synopsis. Now, basically the center of the films plot is (don't worry, I wont give THAT many spoliers) there's this man (Mr. Frendricson) who is reaching the final hours of twilight in his day, his wife is deceased which has caused him great emotional pain. Due to the indrustry moving in and building a metropolis around him, he has decided to go in the footsteps of his childhood hero and convert his own house into a makeshift airship to travel to Paridise Islands in Venezuela, a young boy scout was at the wrong place at the wrong time and while on Frendricison's front porch is carried away into the heavens with our protagonist. Due to a series of misadventures, Mr. Frendricson's vessel crashes near the islands, so he and the boy go through the wilderness of South America to access his destination. The plot greatly thickness beyond that but I will not go into further detail...

This film is far deeper than any other child's film that you are likely to view. It is a beautiful tale through the eyes of a man reaching the end of his days, like the Old Man and the Sea to some degree (classic lore, brilliant). And the antagonist brings an ominous feel to it, making a scholar's mine reminisce of The Most Dangerous Game. The film as some aspects which I thought to be immature but it's a child's film so I cannot complain, however this film is a work of art. It has intelligent themes such as lost love, salvation taken to extremes and a personal journey for the protagonists. If your a kid, you'll like the pretty bird...thingy. If your older and mature, you'll enjoy the deep subplot of the old man and the constant sub-text.

I give this film...a 5/5.

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Video Game Soundtrack Review: Castlevania 64

Hello again, tis me Dark Lord Nollaf. Anyways, I am now a self-proclaimed arbiter of media...well of films and video games that is. Anyways, tonight I am reviewing the soundtrack of Castlevania 64. This game may be mediocre in game play...hang on, I take that back the original version sucked but the revised and greatly expanded Legacy of Darkness (also known as the "Legend of Cornell" version) was significantly better. The soundtrack is quite well done and ominously haunting but yet eerily beautiful...so gorgeous and evil. It suits is perfectly, so dark. Well here are some samples...this soundtrack gets a 4/5.

Introduction/Title Screen: The Title Theme

Dance of Illusions: Thrid Epic Boss Theme

Duel Tower: Background Music for Said Level

Game Over: The Theme that Plays When you Die...

Movie Review: The Lord of the Rings, The Fellowship of the Ring

Hello, tis me Dark Lord Nollaf. Yes, I have changed my title to Dark Lord Nollaf. Suck it up all you Sauron wannabes. Anyways, recently I have been looking over my old DVD collection and I have desided to have a new feature into my blog: Satarday Night Movie Reviews. Because all you fellow pimply virgins have nothing better to do than to listen to my endless rants agianst mankind. Well, sense I lack a girlfriend and I don't like going outside that much (meh, the light burns Nollaf, IT BURNS!) I really can't think of a better use of my time. Anyways, enjoy my review.

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings

Naturally I am a hardcore Tolkein fan, it is a prerequist amongst us geeks to know your Tolkien Lore along with Star Terk trivia. So, overall the movie dose justice to the book. It has all the main aspects of it, The Mines of Moria, the heartqueching Breaking of the Fellowship sequence, Bilbo's 111th Birthday Party and much much more. The casting was great and the whole desing of Middle-Earth was done by two aristis, Allan Lee and John How. Quite famous artists, howevers there is one downside to this film THEY LEFT OUT TOM BOMBIDILL!!!! Yah, that and the Old Forest and the Barrow Downs. But overall the acting is great (Ian M. as Gandalf...woot), the soundtrack (composed and arranged by Howard Shore) along with the script and special effects were all great!

I give this flim a...(drum roll)...4/5 but the extended version (only released on DVD) a 5/5.

Friday, May 29, 2009

An Arch-Rivail for Nollaf and a Wikipedia Article Too

Well then. It looks like that Nollaf has a bit of competition now gentle viewers. A friend of mine has recently uploaded his own blog onto this website. Well, It looks like that I will have to improve my little nook of net a little bit and expand! Yes, it has begun. If you forget the URL for my blog just type in Nollaf's Tower in Wikipedia and along with a synposis of the blog will be the URL! Hurray for my acolytes and me! Now...the name of this rivial I shall not give away after all we are friends in real life. But is alias is "Koobaxion"...formerly known an Endros until he randomly changed it into that. Personally I liked Endros better, but that's just me.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Why Planet X is a Makeshift Theroy and is just Y2K all Over Again

OK, 2012. We all know what it is...the year the apparently the world comes to an ultimate end. Now, rumors have it that December 31 we are all going to f*#$ing die. I am...not buying this. OK, the Mayan Calender Ends that year. So? The Christens said that the Apocalypse will rise when the Middle East fights over water. Well, they are and I don't see the four horsemen braking down my door to drag me to the depths of the Ninth Circle of Dante's Inferno (for you stupid people, that's Hell). So there are some REAL things going on that year: Kyoto Protocol expires and thats about it. OK, so the Mesoamerican Long Count Calender ends that day. Now the calender also only lasted for 5,125 years. Now, so people are saying because something lasting for 5,125 years ends it's the end of all existence on this planet.

How, can the calender of a civilisation who thought that Cortes and his fellow conquistadors (until the went of a gold-crazed massacre) were gods and who practices human sacrifice of young women to keep the sun from vanishing from existence causing Armageddon be true? People, these tribes didn't have the most accurate metaphysical view on things OK? Anyways, there is also another thing that people overlooked. The Mesoamerican Calender also hinted spiritual ascension. That could mean an advancement both mentally and physically. Theories show that rather than the planet spontaneously combusting, we all undergo a consciousness shift so to speak. Suck on that 6th Period! HA! I mock you!

The only bad thing that I can think of that will happen is that fact that there will be a geometric reverse (aka the magnetic field will reverse, forming west to become east and vice versa) which will cause much magnetic technology to become useless, sending some of regions back into the middle ages. I call that a major annoyance, not cataclysmic. There is also a time wave zero theory, this means that the universe will implode on it's self. OK, it is impossible that an expanding universe could implode on it's self without cause or meaning. Physicaly it would cause something of unimaginable proportions to cause the end of everything, the only way that something could end this is the Big Church which no one knows will happen. This is not that the end of the world. It can't work, I know my astronomy and it can't work! Even if a star 1,000,000,000x larger than the red giant Betelgeuse exploded into a supernova, that would hardly to any damage to existence it's self. Besides, even if it did destroy all matter, the universe is expanding and new matter would be created and besides it would not be truly destroyed at all! By the laws of physics, no matter can truly be created or destroyed!

Not to mention, the theory describes it as the end of time! TIME! AGH!!! When will you people understand, chaos, time, order, space. They are all names and ideas that our overactive minds come up with to describe things that we don't fully understand! These things are non-existent and are concepts that we came up to explain the unexplainable, similar to the origins of how man created god and heaven/hell. It's all a load of crap. This pseudoscience has transformed my peers into doomsday cultists. Grr...don't get me wrong I really don't care for them at all, it's just is anyone should be striking fear into their hearts it should be something oh I don't know. CORPORAL AND FACTUAL MAYBE!!!

God, and as for the whole Planet X slamming into the planet theory (aka the Nibiru Collision Theory), oh were to I begin. First of all Planet X was the original name of Pluto, also how can a small planetiod get past a labyrinth-like web of comets surrounding our solar system (the oort cloud). After all the comets bashing would cause to brake apart if not be utterly destroyed. Now, how would this Planet X get past the gravitational pull of Jupiter? The things is over 300 times the size of Earth and is so dense that it could implode and form a star on it's own. It's like a compressed nebula! Now this Planet X would be sucked into the orbit of this planet and would most likely be augmented by the gravitational paradox of the orbit. After all gravity weakness with distance and thus as you stand, your head is not pulled as much as your feet are by Earth's gravitational pull. The difference is so minor that you cannot feel it, however take that same fact onto a larger scale say in Jupiter's vacuum range, you would feel your legs being dragged or ripped apart from your body towards the massive gaseous colossus. But Planet X would be stretched and compressed as it moved in an elliptical orbit thus rendering it no threat, but even if it was moving as such a high speed that it avoided the pull of Jupiter or was too far away to be effected it would get smashed into oblivion by the asteroid belt and the remains would most likely smash into Mars. Or maybe it's the dwarves in Earth's core using a tractor beam to drag the planetiod to us. Or maybe...planet X is really the third model of the Galactic Empires Death Star!!! Or perhaps Sephiroth summoned Planet X to slam into the Earth forcing the Lifestream to rise to the surface, so that he can absorb it and turn into a sephra-like demigod. Please that those were all in major sarcasm quotes.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Oh, ahem. For those of you randomly viewing my blog. I found that few or no people at all bother to comment. Sense I am a noob at blogging I would very much appreciate you humans posting comments as feedback, just so I know that people are actually listening to me. Thank you...

Friday, May 22, 2009

Possibly A Key to Alternate Realities

The Multiverse Theory, something that I have spent a large amount of time thinking about...what is the true purpose of our existence. In the words of Stephen Hawkings, "We have no special place in the universe" and I very much agree. You see to our knowledge humans or sentient life...then again life at all only exists on this planet. I find this is be absurd, with the constant expansion of this plane of existence how can it be possible that we are the only living things in reality? Ridicules. But, with the ignorance of mankind it is quite believable that humans would think this. I hate humans...anyways with the expansion of universe it is possible that more than one dimension exist...parallel realities interloping with our own universe. This is called the multiverse theory. There are 4 kinds of universes possible, each of these fit into in section in a scale called Tegmark's Classisfaction.

Level I: Another Milky Way, Solar System, Sun and Earth created due to an infinite number of Hubble Volumes, after all with the infinite mass and size of the universe there will be another Earth inevitably.

Level II: Small demiplanes forming due to chaotic inflation and physical contrast in the "Astral Plane" aka the gap in between these universes.

Level III: An extension of the Level I universe, if there are going to multiple Earths in the Universe there will also be earths with very minor changes in them, for an example say if you roll a die and that die lands on a six in the Level III universe it could land on any number but odds are it will be different (1/6 chance of it landing on the same number...not good odds).

Level IV: Now, if the universe is in the Astral Plane, what is causing the chaotic inflation with the universe. Level IV universes, something utterly different from our own plane of reality. If you watched the Mist you know what a Level IV universe is. These universes are planes of utter difference from our own with little or nothing in common with our's. With a set of alternate physics and abstract mathematics, this world is like something out of a bad sci-fi movie.

Wormholes: There is only one way that I know of to access these planes of alternate reality, a wormhole. A wormhole is a gap in space-time, created from extreme, unimaginable quantities of energy focused at a single point in space. This causes the space-time continuum to become unstable and break forming a wormhole. A wormhole can open a hole through the Astral Plane and into a Level IV universe or across massive distances in our own universe as a "short cut".

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

A New Twist for this Page

Do to the advent of my triumph. I have decided to replace the song Vamo' Alla Flamenco with something that suites me more. Now, the new song is called "Kefka's Theme". Yes, but unlike many of my posts this is not a tribute to the "Joker of Final Fantasy". This is a tribute to myself. You see Kefka suits me well, for one when ever I take quizzes that are basically "Which Final Fantasy Villain are You?" I get Kefka. That is one reason (we are both misanthropic, somewhat self-loathing but yet highly egotistic, people sometime mock us for our appearance, we go on extremely long rants, we have a cult...well my cult a couple of nutjobs who obey my commands, and just a wee-bit on the insane side) that this song suits me. Another reason is that Kefka's Theme starts off slow and mellow, resembling my time as an angsty emo with no respect from his peers or himself, then the song slowly becomes more intense a bit resembling my somewhat rise to respect and power (aka when I started this blog) and finally with the advent of today in which it swells into forte and becomes bombastic. Also the tone suites my insanity well, I think.
Victory for Zim!!!

Hello, ladies, gentlemen and those with both kinds of junk and no junk alike! Now, Nollaf once again has had a stroke of pure victory and honor. Today there was a talent show at my high school, I preformed and I did my "Gollum Impersonation". Trust me this thing is really good, I'm a pro at it. When the talent show first came on at 5th Period, I was freaking out. After all, my act is...aberrant to say the least. However I am still sane enough not to dress like the fell beast...that would be awkward. Anyways, when it was my turn to go on and unleash the filthy shmoo-like voice within me everyone burst into laughter. Not the "you suck so we mock you laughter", but the "oh my god this dude is so awesome it's ridiculous" laughter. The 7th Graders loved my act, the 8th Graders also did but were not overly impressed (they enjoyed the yo-yo act more, shallow bastards) but my real triumph came with the 9th Graders, my peers. Now they LOVED the act, in fact a few jocks and preps were screaming "WOOT, FALLON, FALLON, FALLON!!!". However, the best moment was the encore, that's right, I got a f@#$ing encore. So I did the whole Minas Morgul scene from the Return of the King. They loved it. I have honor now, I have respect, I am...somewhat popular and my existence is acknowledged by the preps. Strange...how such a geeky skill has earned me so much honor among such shallow people...maybe I underestimated them. Huh, a well I still hate those jocks who mock my studder. May they burn in the 9th Hell of Battor. It would not surprise me if a woman asked me out...hmm...

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Petty Romances

...sigh. What is wrong with me? I have a crush on some one who probably hates me. Now I'm one for forbidden love, I have had more than one run with it. Both times I got physically hurt, not so much emotionally though. Now this woman in question is the opposite of me, she is preppy and evil. Not in the misanthropic, power hungry overlord way like I am, but in the prissy smart-ass without the smart fraction of the praise. In other words, just your stereotypical high school bitch. But, she also has a good side to her. She is definitely intelligent, that is for certain. She has outwitted me on multiple occasions. I have met few who can do that, it is a feat there is no doubt about that. Just, she is quite physically attractive. I think that is what gets me. AAH! How shallow I must be sounding, I'm turning into what I hate, what I have vowed to shun! Gr...I must hold back these petty romances. Or I will become one of them, those mindless preps who mock me so. She is not for me, besides I'm pretty certain that she is taken anyway. I need to find a nice, goth girl who understand my insanity. Yes, that's it. Oh, no doubt that my English teacher is reading this. Let me tell you something 6th period, your not getting this crush out of me so you might as well not even bother. Now excuse me, I must listen to the 3rd Tier of Dancing Mad to quell this minor internal strife...

Well, I have found I song that somewhat serenades my internal feelings for this woman. No doubt you fellow Final Fantasy Fans will understand my plight once you here this.
Click Here to Listen
How can Humans be so...Stupid?

OK, seriously people humanity fails. Now, a majority of the people lack the intelligence nessearcy to locate our content on the f$%^ing globe. I am a some what tolerant person, some what. But my generation of humans is going to end up ruining the country. I asked a few of them what misanthropic meant all of them did not know. I mean COME ON! I'm barely in high school and these fools do not understand what metaphysics is? ITS A F$%^ING BRANCH OF PHILOSOPHY YOU FEEBLE-MINDED MONKEYS! Amazing how in millions of years of evolution and we have just figured out how to access our own moon. How can these fools live with themselves if they are so...stupid? I mean come on! The only future for these fools is either a fast food joint or a guest appearance on a jackass-rip off. These fools are going to be the most patheticly dim witted generation sense 1660 (The generation of the Salem Witch Trails)...OK I'm done ranting.